It’s easy to mistake emotional theorizing with real emotional expression. However the distinction is important. Analyzing emotions (or other people’s emotions) is much easier than expressing emotions.
Expressing emotions means being so present to ourselves that we express the emotion that’s coming up inside. This often appears as a felt sense (clenched stomach, tense shoulders) before it becomes an emotion we can cognitively identify as anger, sadness, hurt, fear, or joy.
Emotional connection doesn’t come from theorizing, it comes from expressing emotions. It’s terrifying—what if expressing them scares other people away? It might scare away a few, but most people will be much less afraid of actual expression than of being taken on a theoretical, emotional head trip.